I believe the easiest manner in which to handle a film like The Monster Maker is to go straight into a plot synopsis and then begin exploring the possible, however implausible, justifications for what occurred cinematically.

Doctor Igor Markoff (J. Carrol Naish) becomes infatuated with Patricia Lawrence (Wanda McKay) after he spots her at a piano recital given by her father, Anthony (Ralph Morgan). After Anthony personally addresses Igor, telling him his continual gifts of flowers to his daughter is not wanted, Igor injects Anthony with serum that causes Acromegaly, a “very rare” disease which malforms the body. Anthony is diagnosed by his personal physician, Doctor Adams (Sam Flint), who tells his patient that Anthony’s only hope resides in Igor, the world’s foremost researcher in the disease. Anthony then realizes the ruse: Igor can now call his own terms, meaning Patricia’s hand in marriage in exchange for the cure.

The film is interesting in that it serves as a three-and-a-half decade predecessor to David Lynch’s Elephant Man in its depiction of someone with Acromegaly. Not only that, but when Anthony first appears in Igor’s office, he is dressed almost exactly as John Hurt’s character in Lynch’s film (cf. the movie poster for The Elephant Man). Also, J. Carrol Naish is a mirror image, sans a demonic goatee, of modern-day actor Hank Azaria.

Obviously, if I’m beginning my commentary with such superficial notes, the work evidently lacks anything of more substantial merit. Aside from the aforementioned trivia, there is little to admire in the film because it does not challenge on any other level. It kept my interest for the most part yet I found myself preoccupied midway through as I tried to remember Azaria’s name.

The editor, Holbrook Todd, with as many hard cuts as he made during the film, was either victim to Parkinson’s Disease or a damn cheap hire. The screenwriting team of Pierre Gendron, Martin Monney (Detour), Lawrence Williams, which apparently required three warm bodies in order to create such inane dialogue, the worst of which was reserved for McKay, the performer that was least qualified to appear in front of the camera, bombards the audience with unnecessarily stifled, parrot-like reiterations from the final words of the preceding line of dialogue (especially when a character is on the phone). I now need to dig out the plaster from the basement in order to fill the forehead-sized dent in the wall next to the couch.

A run-of-the-mill movie of the time with the addendum that several films, Lynch’s being the most famous, followed which implemented the theme of Acromegaly as its byline.

-Egregious Gurnow