The double-sided DVD is a fine thing – two films (or in this case, three) for the price of one, all wrapped up in a singular little package. Who can argue with that? Unfortunately, anyone who falls into the trap of bargain basement indie clearing houses such as this. Billed as “A double dose of murder, madness and lust,” this set films brings us the dinner theatre murder mystery And Then They Were Dead… along with a pair of futurities comprising Guilty Pleasures. And all of them have something in common, as we shall see.
Some uneven camera work through what looks like the Jersy Pine Barrens tracks some city broad as she pulls off the main strip, hopelessly lost. Stepping out of her car to use a cell phone she’s suddenly confronted by a masked figure in a leather trench coat, and techno music begins to bounce as she’s chased screaming through the trees in her go-go boots. Finally caught and stabbed to death by the maniac her head is taken as a souvenir, while all the while the entire event is being filmed by an unknown observer.
Following this low-grade appetizer the plot begins to congeal, based around a gourmet meal that a handful of select individuals have been invited to attend under the condition that they also sit through a promising business proposition. In ones and twos the seven guests begin showing up at the ‘mansion’ where the dinner is to be held, quickly proving themselves a mixed and uptight bunch as they awkwardly get acquainted. These include Dr. Mark Reibolt (Joseph Zaso) and his wife Rebecca (Lynn Macri), Lance (Ray Schwetz) and his paid escort Sarah (Tina Krause), and singles Hunter (Devon Mikolas), Leo (Frank Gagliardetto) and Anna the vegetarian (Sarah K. Lippmann). The host is nowhere to be seen as of yet, prefering to remain anonymous and watch the group through a series of closed-circuit cameras as they’re attended to by a butler (Willie Hill) and a French maid (Darian Caine, still slumming after being unseated by Misty Mundae as Seduction Cinema’s main hottie).
During their “gourmet meal” of assorted cheeses and roast meats the maid, Gabrielle, gets some wine spilled on her black uniform and decides to strip naked and bathe. During her shower the masked killer strikes again, slashing her to death with a straight razor and filming her dead body as Dr. Mark accidentally asphyxiates his wife to death during a quickie in the adjoining bathroom. Rebecca’s body, hidden in the shower stall, is quickly discovered, and with it the fact that the phone is dead and the cars have been disabled. As the rest of the guests mill around outside in fearful uncertainty, Mark gets drunk, talks to his dead wife, plays with the dinner leftovers, and finds the head of the film’s first victim in the refrigerator. Just at this point the other guests enter the kitchen, and Leo is so surprised that he blows Mark’s head apart with the shotgun retrieved from his car.
In the aftermath it is realized, partially based on the mystery chef’s use of Gray’s Anatomy as a cookbook, that the group has been feasting on the dead girl’s body. (If that’s the case, where the hell did those turkey legs come from?!) Somehow this isn’t quite as shocking as it’s supposed to be, but the guests go ahead and freak out anyway. Anna runs to the bathroom to have her wrists slit, the butler puts Leo, overpowered after his little overreaction, to bed and stabs him in the head, Lance takes the gun and wanders around outside in the dark until the killer beats him half to death (despite his macho posturing), and Sarah and Hunter wander around and find the butler’s dead body.
Following their grisly discovery Sarah and Hunter go back to the dining room for some salad and a remarkably out of place heart-to-heart chat, then go out to find Lance just before the killer finishes him off. Running back inside the pair wander around some more, fuck around in the basement for a little while, and finally come to the heart of the mystery.
And I’d gladly provide a spoiler here, except for the fact that the film does a pretty adequate job of spoiling itself. Through sheer laziness (a script packed with filler and a cast lacking enthusiasm) the filmmakers somehow manage to counteract their intended atmosphere of tension and claustrophobia and turn a murder mystery into a snorefest. (Despite putting a bit of a spin on it, the ‘surprise’ ending isn’t as much of a surprise as it is a relief – the end is near!) And a derivative snorefest at that; the plotline here, dinner guests being eliminated one by one for some insidious purpose, is reminiscent of Agatha Christie’s 1939 tale Ten Little Indians, right down to the US title of Christie’s book, And Then There Were None.
Along with the plot hinging upon an unoriginal idea, the sets too clearly betray their budgetary restraints to allow for that ‘willing suspension of disbelief’ all-important to the successful cinematic experience. A newscast looks like a bad cable access show; the “gourmet meal” is a bargain buffet of supermarket specials (meat casserole? Kielbasas? cheap-ass sold-by-the-liter wine?); and the ‘mansion’ in which most of the action takes place is ridiculously cramped and shoddily furnished (in fact it appears that the interior and exterior belong to two entirely separate homes).
Matching these factors, there is also a profound lack of attention to detail present in the film; in one scene a woman is stabbed through the hand with an obviously retractable blade that doesn’t emerge from the other side; a woman sits down to pee and give herself a pregnancy test – on a closed toilet seat; after coming inside out of the dark a guest says, “I’m not going out there, it’s gonna be dark soon”; after a ‘sex’ scene the guy not only still has his pants on, but his belt is still buckled; etc.
As mentioned before, the acting skills of the cast are also sub-par, whether they’re bickering with one another or reacting inappropriately to the murderous activities taking place all around them. (Needless to say, with all of the bodies popping up nobody thinks to just leave the house and, say, GO ACROSS THE STREET FOR HELP.)
And lastly, as do many low-budget indie filmmakers, the producers of And Then They Were Dead… make the common mistake of shooting on tape rather than on film. All of the attendant flaws are painfully clear, the muted colors, the many scenes shot too dark (which gets old in a big hurry), the prismatic graininess and moiré patterns in clothing, foliage and wallpaper, and the ultra-cheap quality of the mastermind’s spy camera footage, all of which further degrade the viewing experience.
- Interview with J.R. Bookwalter - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Andrew J. Rausch - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Rick Popko and Dan West - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Director Stevan Mena (Malevolence) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Screenwriter Jeffery Reddick (Day of the Dead 2007) - January 22, 2015
- Teleconference interview with Mick Garris (Masters of Horror) - January 22, 2015
- A Day at the Morgue with Corri English (Unrest) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Writer/Director Nacho Cerda (The Abandoned, Aftermath) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Actress Thora Birch (Dark Corners, The Hole, American Beauty) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Actor Jason Behr, Plus Skinwalkers Press Coverage - January 22, 2015
