Directed by Andy Signore & T.J. Nordaker
Ever wonder what it’s like having a job so shitty that even elementary school kids make fun of you? Looked down on as the lowest of the low no matter how well you do your job? Because after all, you’re just…The Janitor.
Andy Signore IS Lionel the janitor, a custodial engineer whose demeaning position in life is made clear from the very start. Occupying a step below the lowest rung on the Generico Corporation ladder, Lionel is a ticking time bomb whose miserable existence consists of taking shit, sometimes literally, from the company’s ‘real’ employees. When not cleaning up their mess he hangs out at home, in the company’s cramped janitor’s closet, with his mentor, veteran of the custodial arts Mr. Cornelius Growbo (Bruce Cronander).
But Lionel’s life isn’t over yet. In fact he’s already begun to take his revenge on the corporate world, and in recent months there have been thirteen “bizarre incident(s) or disappearance(s)” which we quickly attribute to our bristly protagonist. The most recent of these was the untimely demise of an employee who made the mistake of grievously insulting Lionel in the men’s room, and before the film is over there will be many, many more.
Lionel has ambitions as well – namely the recently widowed Hillary (Fiona MacIntyre). But Lionel’s aspirations in this direction are shot down when Hillary leaves the company, precisely because of the above-mentioned incidents. Realizing that he’s driven away the woman he loves Lionel begins looking for other work, someplace where the memories aren’t as painful. And it looks like he might have found it, at the Tau Nu Alpha sorority house. Excitedly he tells Mr. Growbo that he’s found his dream job, but instead of being happy for his young protégé Cornelius is crushed. In the past weeks he’s come to join Lionel on his psychopathic escapades, and been considerably revitalized for it (certain FBI agents and certain bodily fluids might have been involved). Now that their custodial union is dissolving, they have an argument as heated as any two men who live in a closet together can have.
But like Lionel Mr. Growbo is a fighter, and his revenge takes a most curious form. Lionel loses that dream job, and in a rage he hacks apart a pair of particularly troublesome Generico employees he finds having sex in the reception area. Caught in the act by his replacement, Willis (John Carreon), Lionel forms an alliance with the younger broom-pusher. Aside from being a janitor Willis has a few other major screws loose, and he’s more than ready to help his new buddy Lionel take revenge on Mr. Growbo and those sluts at TNA. And so, after a parody of athletic training montages, Lionel and Willis set out to set things right…
And oh man, is it gross! A heinous satire of sorority slashers follows, along with the appropriate level of carnage. And then…and then…well let’s just say there are more than a few surprises to the film’s dramatic conclusion(s), along with some genuinely funny shit. (Would you believe…broom fu?)
An indie film professionally packaged but arriving without much on the promotional side, I didn’t know too much about The Janitor other than the fact that one critic likened this “must see horror/comedy of the year” to the early classics of both Peter Jackson and Sam Raimi. What said critic neglected to mention was the Troma family of films, a stable that evidently had a great deal more influence over filmmakers Signore and Nordaker – so much so that the pair even went and threw in a nice little bit part for Troma head Lloyd Kaufman. But even if you don’t recognize old Lloyd you will recognize his influence as the sticky severed limbs begin to pile up.
I’ve got to admit, I was a little skeptical about this flick at first, seeing it as something of a gory low-budget version of The Temp. Man is this thing lowbrow. But then I got a grip on myself and remembered that I’m a pretty lowbrow guy. In fact, I love that shit. And The Janitor delivers it in spades: rude comedic dialogue, a dead man’s hand job, a load of tits, and all manner of bodily secretions. Oh yeah, and gummy bear sex games. And although this review doesn’t adequately convey it, the picture is bloody as all hell, with non-stop slapstick violence resulting in a truly massive body count.
Director Signore plays The Janitor well, as a seething hairy brute who looks equally at home taking out the garbage and tearing somebody’s head off. Also good is John Carreon as Willis, the gawky new perv on the job. And Crystal Lebard plays office slut Mary with such sultry vigor that, well, I wish she worked at my office. But it’s Bruce Conander as Mr. Growbo who really steals the picture. A buff intense older guy, Conander not only has one of the most colorful roles in the film but also commits one of the grossest acts in it as well.
The film is well shot, with much better lighting than is found in many independent features. It’s given a full-screen presentation, and is unrated for “Extreme violence and nudity.” The only extra feature on the DVD is the trailer (no chapter selection, no t-shirt offers, etc. – my copy did come with a pretty cool sticker though). But there’s more than enough sickness and wrongness throughout the picture to keep you from worrying over the lack of special features. Check out the Website, www.janitormovie.com, for details and ordering information.
Because if you’ve read this far, you’re probably going to want to see it.
- Interview with J.R. Bookwalter - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Andrew J. Rausch - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Rick Popko and Dan West - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Director Stevan Mena (Malevolence) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Screenwriter Jeffery Reddick (Day of the Dead 2007) - January 22, 2015
- Teleconference interview with Mick Garris (Masters of Horror) - January 22, 2015
- A Day at the Morgue with Corri English (Unrest) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Writer/Director Nacho Cerda (The Abandoned, Aftermath) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Actress Thora Birch (Dark Corners, The Hole, American Beauty) - January 22, 2015
- Interview with Actor Jason Behr, Plus Skinwalkers Press Coverage - January 22, 2015
